JwoqtY

To the 21 year old woman who's attracted to the 35 year old guy. It's dead easy for you: just ask him out, and he'll be yours instantly!! Few guys that age would pass off that chance.

I like a guy who works with me, I'm 21, he's 35. I have always dated guys my own age and never been attracted to older men. It was unusual when I found myself attracted to this man and now I can't get him out of my head. I've tryed to ignore the chemistry, and dismissed it as a silly crush.

The thing is, I think he likes me too but hasn't done anything about it because he probably thinks he has no chance with me because I'm so much younger.

Is there anything I can do without being too forward?

2 months ago I would have said anything beyond a 10 yr age difference wasn't right, I never saw this coming!!!!

I am woman of 63 with a lover of 25, which is so good, so go for it even if he is so much older. My issue would be, is he able???

I'[m 61 and available,, looking for a really younger girl to fall in love.

I am 54 and finding a man 73 years old to be very kind, caring and showing loving affection that I have craved all my life. Everyone says we are crazy and we have no future financially, and the evidence indicates that. Fulfillment in life can come in other ways than success. Happiness certainly does not come from $$$...you can't eat it, touch it, feel that it loves you. That is what I get from this man. We both are giving up what others work a lifetime for. Security. Perhaps we can make it somehow.

I am 24 and my husband is 60. We have been married for 5 years and have a wonderful healthy daughter, and a son on the way. My husband is more active than I am. He is in better shape than most men MY age. Older men have more to offer a woman. They are experienced in life. I am not with my husband for money and he is not with me because I am young and hot. We are together because we both want the same things in life. He is not a "wrinkled boring old man"! There is nothing wrong with a woman wanting a man who knows how to respect her, treat her as an equal and who can care for her. My husband makes me feel safe, loved and respected. Men my age that I have been with have only wanted to party, drink and have sex. I don't think young woman should have to settle for less just because society says they have to be with men there age. Everyone, man or woman, has the right to be happy, feel loved, respected, and protected. Age shouldn't stop a couple from being together.
And our sex life is very good by the way!

This is sexist what about women who have babies late in life is that good for the species too? I read that as a man gets older his sperm ages too, can that effect the health of the baby? Would a woman have a healthier baby with a younger man? And the older man may not live long enough to truly be there for the child . Women are having children later in life and with new techniques are having children very old even in their 60s ... its all kind of weird. Personally I think menopause was created to give women a break from childbearing. In this society of population growth out of control maybe less children are better?

That's the worst part, but he IS amazing!

Good for you! totally agree. Older men even into there later 70's do know what women in their 40's want and need. I enjoyed the relationship I once had with my special someone just too bad it had to end wish I could have made it last but too many obstacles were in our way. We are still go friends and that is all I could hope for.

Hi, I a 23 years old and met a guy at the age of 53 four years ago, we fell inlove and went through many things from feeling embarrassed to be seen with an older guy to problems of our own... insecurity. Eventually things worked out, we had a beautiful baby boy nine months ago and got married last weekend which we were planning before our baby was born. it was beautiful and so many people are happy for us. I love him with all my heart and all I want to do is make him happy but some how I do think things are slowly but surely changimg in the bedroom is it the same with you or is it bound to happen?

I see; If a man is healthy and vigorous enough to impregnate women into his 50s and 60s, he will pass those good genes along, doing a favor to the human race.
I will do my part! -- Benjamin

I for one am happy to see two people get together and be happy; I don't care about the age thing. I don't think it's for me, but then, I'm in a great relationship with my husband who's essentially my age, so I'm not looking. But I think that being with someone is different than creating a child with them, and I think it's great that more attention from the scientific community is being given to what risks, if any, there are to reproducing children when parents are older.
http://mp3santa.com/

So many different positions on a subject that is kind of delicate. To those that have come out successful & claim to have found true love- Bravo! To those who are so naive and judgmental take a look at the reality of how prevalent this is. After all, it does an evolutionary base. BUT for our society now, does this evolutionary basis really seem all that relevant? No, not ALL women who marry are in it purely for the money or security I assume, but it definitely makes you question their motives.

I read a comment from someone who is 50 and married to a 29 yr old woman with a 1 yr old child…WITH a 1 yr old grandchild. See, for me being in the position of the child from the original marriage who has that grandchild that is the same age as their aunt/uncle it’s kind of hard to swallow. That means your half brother/sister is over 20something years younger than yourself. Logically this doesn’t seem like it constitutes a good formula for a healthy, happy family…but eh, when put in that situation you have to just deal I assume. I guess form the evolutionary standpoint it’s perfectly ok…because, after all, it turns out that older men chasing younger women contributes to human longevity…right?! Too bad polygamy is illegal now.

I agree with some other comments…this article sounds as if they tweaked the data to feed their need to boost their male egos and reiterate that men are important all the way to old age.

Within 5-7 years is your best bet.

Interesting. I've read something similar: "when there's paleoanthropology...there's paleoanthropology." Words to live by, youngsters.

somewhere I read "when there´s chemistry... there's chemistry", that's it.

Usually have to be either very attractive (Demi Moore) or significantly better off to get a younger male. The older men only have to be rich or famous or of perceived "high status" (Hugh Hefner).

I once knew an older man who worked for Frederico Fellini. He won an Oscar for his work on one of Fellini's films. I was 20, he was around 70. I was not attracted to him, however, there were some 20 something females who were attracted to this guy once they found out who he was. They would not have looked at him twice had he just been any old guy walking down the street - but once his status was revealed they were practically dry humping him at dinner.

I still wasn't interested. However he took a great interest in me, and I'm SURE I wasn't as hot looking as some of these bimbos who were after him.

Moral - people want what they (think they) can't get.

I am 21 and I have always been attracted to older men. I have had one relationship with a man my age, it was the longest lasting relationship but I couldn't say why. I think alot of that 2 years was spent wasting time.
I love feeling protected. Older men are secure. I realise that relationships are give and take and you're always learning new things together or from one another, but I get so frustrated with inexperience and feeling like I'm the more mature one in the relationship. I want my man to be my solid ground, be the wiser half.
For a woman I think its fair to have a few expectations, I mean.. we will be carrying their child and then pushing it out one day. Ha.
All good and well there, however I DO appreciate a certain degree of wealth in my men. Not because I'm a gold digger who wants a life of sitting on my arse without doing a thing, driving a BMW. But because when the day arrives that im a wife and a mother, I don't want to be a 'Working Mother'. I want to spend those vital years at home with my children. I want my kids to have no boundaries on the activities they do, or schools they attend. Therefore, for what I want, I require a man who makes a fair amount of money.
Attraction is another issue, some find the idea of being with an older person a little repulsive. But at the end of the day, its your souls that are connecting. I think its important to be able to look at your partner and think to yourself "I love you", but is it really neccesary to go through life looking at your partner thinking "Gawwdd, your a sexy devil". Beauty doesn't last forever. I consider myself a very attractive individual, which I'm not ashamed to admit. But I would be very disturbed if some one was to consider pursuing a relationship with me for my appearance. Because... where will they be when im 40 and I'm still madly in love with them? They may not be with me any more.
Summing it up, concluding with this.. There is nothing wrong with wanting a stable older man who will always practise respect within the home and pass on valuable lessons to their offspring. Money makes the world spin, unfortunately. Theres no such thing as a free lunch, so we need money, yes? Some need more than others and its a personal decision and is not to be judged.
One day (if all goes to plan) I will be able to offer my children the old fashioned stay at home Mum and a wise and respectful father.

In this country it is prefectly normal and accepted for older men to marry or date younger women. Now if it's good for the population as a whole? It sure is good for the economy!

http://www.westsend.com

It is interesting and very entertaining to watch how an objective statement of a possible correlation of May-December pairings and species survival quickly transformed into a multitude of reactive subjective reports. The richness of the inner world is truly wonderful and stands in stark contrast to the single minded statement that started these replies but one should remember that the data is not yet complete enough to make an "objective" acceptance of the proposal.

Amen!

Bertrand Russel said something like "Only after letting go of all physical possesions can we truly live freely and nobly". Under the social constructs of today's society, just how many people are free from social and financial pressures?

Very few. The money is the catalyst for all of these absurd relationships, granted there are a few that are pure, but those numbers are almost statistically insignificant.

I speak the truth. We need to ascribe to a higher intelectual standard of living before an argument can possibly be made.

You know your right. That'd probably be your daughter's age.

There are more females than males, and if a small percentage of the available females decide to pair with older males it may not make a noticeable difference. We really need to know the numbers to know either way - but I'm sure you can see my point. And this doesn't take into account the percentage of the population that is not heterosexual. If there are more males than females who are not heterosexual - that leaves more females available as well.

I doubt there is anything you can say or explain that is going to make anyone understand the human dynamic without labels or categorization. Whatever taboo that arises, or convention that is broken, if not understood already, can only be learned by experience. I mean, what do we really know about things we are skeptical and judgmental about until we've been faced with the experience ourselves? People are people, and there isn't much we can do to define or assume the things we really don't know. People can make their own choices, and these life experiences are neither good or bad, but what we make them and get out of them in terms of learning. Why waste your time trying to fit into some mold of how life should be?

My first question to you is, what about all the young men with older women? The same thing is going on.. where a young women is without that young man. So she finds an older man and settles down. Ta-dah.

Secondly, you must be very young to think all old men are boring! I know an older man who is most certainly not boring and his wrinkles are attractive (who would have thought?). I enjoy the friendship we have and it is not about money or status because those things do not matter to me (I can make my own money, thank you).

I never expected to be in love with a man 19 years older than I am, in fact I usually dated men who were my age, or about 2 years younger/older. I am 33 dating a 52-year old man.He does not look wrinkly and bore me with stories about the past, but is rather physically fit (much more so than me) and well-versed for engaging conversations. We have been seeing each other for 2 wonderful years. The love and respect we have for each other is unparalleled with any other person I have dated, and I am so grateful.

At first I remember thinking I should not be falling in love with someone older because it does not fit the traditional model of a romantic couple. I ruminated over this issue for a long time when our relationship became romantic, and I spoke about it with close friends. I came to the conclusion that LOVE GOES BEYOND RACE, ETHNICITY, AGE, FAITH, or EVEN SEXUAL ORIENTATION. Love has no boundaries, there is no algorithm for love, it happens organically, and when it happens you should cherish it. Forget what "the masses" think, the love you share is between you and your significant other,and this is all that matters.

My parents are 17 years apart, and yes, this is their only marriage. My mom is not a trophy wife, in fact she is average-looking, cheerful and spiritual. My parents are best friends. Even though my father is retired, my mother still works. My mother certainly did not marry my father for reasons pertaining to power, status or wealth; they marriage is one built on sincere love and respect for each other.

As the child of an older father-younger mother, I did sometimes feel self-conscious about the fact my dad was older than most of my classmates' fathers but this basically occurred in late middle school and high school when most of us are prone to think about what our peers think of us.

In the last 10 years I feel like my father has aged much faster than my mom; having seen this development, as well as having predicted this would happen, I always told myself I would rather be with someone with whom I can grow old, instead of worrying about potentially outliving my significant other for many years. For this reason I deliberately dated men my age. I am sure there are men my age who are mature, but in general, over the years, the men I dated were not as mature with respect to relationships and were driven by testosterone. I think they were more interested in talking about themselves, trying to impress me and trying to hook up (note the word trying) rather than getting to know someone deeply in every sense of the word. Of course, the above does not apply to every man my age, but there seems to be a disproportionate number of younger men who fit this build. In general, I think older men appreciate women more than younger men, perhaps it stems from wisdom accumulated over many years. By the way, when I refer to older men, I am referring to men who are 10 years older than women.

I know it would be more ideal to be in love with a man closer to me in age, I know this, trust me, but love is precious and when it happens you should let it flow and appreciate what you have. People who believe women date/marry older men for financial reasons, clearly have very limited views about love, and are looking to scapegoat older men for the fact that they (the younger men who have these stereotypical thoughts) maybe having difficulty attracting women they desire. These younger men are perhaps the type who think in general that women will only date them if they wine and dine them. Well, believe it or not, it's not about the amount of money you spend on a woman, but rather based on the amount of respect you show this person. Some women will be impressed with superficial elements, but if you are attracted to this type of person what does it say about you? You might be superficial and therefore assume everyone else thinks like you too.

All in all, please do not make sweeping generalizations about younger women with older men, or vice-versa. I can assure you that most younger women with older men appreciate being in a mature relationship with someone who values and respects them as women, rather than view them as sexual objects. Just remember, love is a gift, and should be cherished regardless of one's age, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation or faith. Love DOES NOT DISCRIMINATE. Hopefully, everyone reading this lengthy note has or will experience deep love, and recognize it for what it is. Wishing you only the best with peace, love and health.

The younger women that these older men pick on that show always flake off after the first date, leaving the older men to wonder why. The "older man/younger woman" saying is a myth.
I know several guys over forty, almost in their fifties, who are still waiting for that unsual younger woman to come along and marry them. Why? Because they want to have children.
Another subject would be the unsual young woman who marries a much older guy while in her twenties, only to divorce him in her late twenties to early thirties, and find that now that she is in her thirties, she would much rather marry someone her own age, but can't find a guy her own age to marry her, because the men her age want marry someone in their twenties. Meaning, "women who waste their youth on older men".

"...there's a young man without a woman" ??? The near paritiy in population of men and women makes this statement an illogical blunder.The characterization of older men is simple minded in the extreme. There should be a lower limit of rational ability to post here.

Some of these replies sound like young girls who are complaining about woman that marry or date older men. You need not be rich to date younger woman. I have travel to more than 70 countries and in many countries I have dated woman 20 or 30 years younger than myself. Why! Number one is respect for a woman and not trying just having a sexual relationship with them. Some I dated because they were terrific tennis players, other because they were intellectually fascinating. The Pedophile comment sounds like a girl that couldn't fine a relationship because of a narrow minded view of all things in life. If you think you are better than someone else because you are older or younger or because your choices are different than others you have a lot to learn before you are mature enough for any relationships. Many books have been written and few really know why people fall in love. Security, maturity, supporting each other in times of need, humor the list goes on and on. Women have sent me over a glass of wine to just say hi, other have come over and ask if they could take me to lunch, others have ask if I would mind if they kissed me! Others want nothing to do with me. Woman and men choose each other for more different reason then there are words to explain their reasons. I could care less if a woman is old or young or they have a great figure, or are gorgeous to the eye. Think of woman like Brittney Spears. What man in his right mind, with all her money, beauty, age and shape, that is mature would even consider a long term relationship with any woman or man with habits, illnesses and behavior such as hers. There were hundreds of young woman I could have dated that were in great shape, that I would have never considered dating because of their attitudes in life, which they are entitle to have and own their own feelings. To attack others that think differently than I is nuts. If not being with a person that is older than you are or younger than you are is not what you want in life you have a right to choose, but why be angry at people that find happiness. If a young woman wants security, with an older man who can provide it what is the big deal! Younger woman most likely dated me because they had fun, they felt relaxed and safe with me, they understood the importance of honesty and directness, I knew and express that some woman use men for money and sex. Older men are more relaxed and to be honest better lovers. Older men are more likely to break a young girls heart because younger woman fall in love to easily with being treated with respect, and a partner that is less likely to cheat on them. For you young woman reading this be careful it takes more than a great shape, gorgeous eyes and being vivacious to land an older and wiser catch. Younger woman must be very clever to land any good catch in life young or old but especially older!!

Some of these replies sound like young girls who are complaining about woman that marry or date older men. You need not be rich to date younger woman. I have travel to more than 70 countries and in many countries I have dated woman 20 or 30 years younger than myself. Why! Number one is respect for a woman and not trying just having a sexual relationship with them. Some I dated because they were terrific tennis players, other because they were intellectually fascinating. The Pedophile comment sounds like a girl that couldn't fine a relationship because of a narrow minded view of all things in life. If you think you are better than someone else because you are older or younger or because your choices are different than others you have a lot to learn before you are mature enough for any relationships. Many books have been written and few really know why people fall in love. Security, maturity, supporting each other in times of need, humor the list goes on and on. Women have sent me over a glass of wine to just say hi, other have come over and ask if they could take me to lunch, others have ask if I would mind if they kissed me! Others want nothing to do with me. Woman and men choose each other for more different reason then there are words to explain their reasons. I could care less if a woman is old or young or they have a great figure, or are gorgeous to the eye. Think of woman like Brittney Spears. What man in his right mind, with all her money, beauty, age and shape, that is mature would even consider a long term relationship with any woman or man with habits, illnesses and behavior such as hers. There were hundreds of young woman I could have dated that were in great shape, that I would have never considered dating because of their attitudes in life, which they are entitle to have and own their own feelings. To attack others that think differently than I is nuts. If not being with a person that is older than you are or younger than you are is not what you want in life you have a right to choose, but why be angry at people that find happiness. If a young woman wants security, with an older man who can provide it what is the big deal! Younger woman most likely dated me because they had fun, they felt relaxed and safe with me, they understood the importance of honesty and directness, I knew and express that some woman use men for money and sex. Older men are more relaxed and to be honest better lovers. Older men are more likely to break a young girls heart because younger woman fall in love to easily with being treated with respect, and a partner that is less likely to cheat on them. For you young woman reading this be careful it takes more than a great shape, gorgeous eyes and being vivacious to land an older and wiser catch. Younger woman must be very clever to land any good catch in life young or old but especially older!!

David Letterman and Rod Stewart can have babies with younger females because they are wealthy and have status in society. You old guys, please don't think you can get a young girl with (your) assets being less than 1 million. I know an older guy at work, in his 50s, that married a 20 year old from another country. It was so ridiculous, I felt very sorry for the man. The women (or girl) took his total retirement,and house and now he has to work until he is 70 to regain a portion of his retirement. They are divorced and she is now married to a guy her own age. Unless, you are David Letterman- don't go for anyone more than 10 years younger than yourself. Believe me, this girl will wake up one day and ask herself if the stability is really worth it and split.

When you were 20 they weren't even born. There is term called Pedophile -- Look it up sometime! I wouldn't talk to any old men in the real world --don't think that just because you're sitting anonymously behind the computer gives you the right to cyberstalk women online. You are sick and disgusting in my opinion. BYE!!

Hi, just wanted to say well done to the girl who is engaged to be married to her older partner.I am 28 and have a 57 year old partner.we have been together for over a year and yes sometimes he annoys me as i do him but you get that in all relationships lol . Im not saying its the easist thing to get past in the beginning but we have made it so far and im very happy.Age is only a number so if you can get past that then there is no reason why you cant have a happy relationship with then just as much as you would do with someone your own age.I understand some people may not understand exactly what i am saying but i guess all i am trying to say is dont judge people just because they fell in love with someone who happens to be older.Its just nice that the person has found someone special to them.

I personally think you are a loser who can't get a woman,young or old.Maybe young women want a man who has accomplished something in life and not a young man that brags about what he's going to do.Or maybe your flame dumped you for an older man.

give it a couple more years when she understands what she has done to herself.....and dont think its not comming....

This is a good article. We are living so much longer than our ancestors. We have yet to see the long term inplications of older parents on their children's DNA.

Only time will tell.

There may be a link to Autism with older males just as there is a link to Downs Syndrom with mothers of advanced maternal age.

older man younger woman ..works as good as older woman younger man ...if you can suplie an easier life to them they will make consessions...iam 46 and slept with much older and 10 years younger..and i assure you ...lol much younger is a lot more satisfing...than you have to take in consideration...what works in the long run i think 5 years up or down give and take a few...will be most resonable ...when there is a huge age gap that older person only thinks of themselfs and they know it and make silly excuses...here is the cenario the woman is 50 and her old man 75 dies she is now to old to find someone decent lol because all the old daddys want 35...so the reminder of her life will be spent alone ...how wonderful ...and all this to make some old gezzer feel better about himself...always remember there is a price to pay for everything and sometimes we dont even have the minimum payment at hand ...when a fool is in his 40ties and has not come into himself he will die a fool...

Let me start out questioning some of the premises some of you have written. Using the term OLD, as in musty... passé, out of date, dilapidated, wrinkled, etc. All of this has the inevitable ring to it of "ageism". Yes there seems to be a need to rethink all the issues around age. I have found that the term OLD, carries with it the stigma, that when someone wants to be considerate, they right away attach some sort of condescending statement, such as " however, not you...."; or "in your case it is different"; or, "well some people are young at your age..", etc. etc. It smacks too much like all the same sort of cliches that are also present when dealing with race, religion, sexual preferences, nationality, handicapped, etc. Lets get real, the culture is one were all such "differences" are never the source for empathy, respect or even knowledge about the other.

I am 72, and my fiancee is 27. Not even the fact that she will outlive me, is a given. I sure hope she does, but who is there to say that she is providentially protected from any mishap in life. So let us focus on the important issues of why two people come together and spend every possible waking hour together. We work together, we play together, we travel, and party together. We discuss and look out after each other with all the care and dedication that two people who love each other can do. Is she better off with me, than with someone closer to her age? or am I better off with her rather than someone closer to my age? The answer to both our questions is of course yes. Because if that "other" person would be there, we would not be with each other. Are we guaranteed that this will always be the case? of course not, but age has nothing to do with that fact. It has more to do with getting along well, with each other.

Some of the comments here about women fancying an older man because of his wealth, is like the comment of an older man fancying a women because of her shape. There is no shame in a woman valuing the fact that she feels protected economically ( even female lions stay with their lion king in order for him to be their protector), or inversely, why not celebrate the beauty of a young woman who is in good shape? Of course I like the good shape of my partners body, but then if that was the only thing that brought us together, I assure you our relationship would very soon slip away. Probably replaced by someone in even better shape. Remember, there can always be some one richer and someone prettier around the bend.

But as none of this is a competition, but rather the excitement of living together, and sharing life in all of its unfolding diversity and splendor, one should be humble enough to understand that all that one can aspire it to have as a companion someone with whom to celebrate that relationship day in day out. I would venture to say, that one of the advantages of age, is that I have no longer any sort of crisis as to who I am, men my age, already know who they are, for better or worse, we are better in tune with our foibles and limitations than at an earlier stage in life. That enables us both, to allow my partner to take center stage with regard to such issues. She of course still has to find he own voice and meanings in life. Feeling loved and protected, certainly contributes to her sense of self, and finding her own true voice. Being in love is also about making room for each others frailties.

It's quite obvious she hears and sees better than I, and thus at times becomes my guide through those moments when her abilities become important to me. As you can see, our relationship is built around the fact that we both contribute to the relationship, and we contribute all sorts of different talents and abilities, expertise and knowledge, from vantage points that are at a considerable distance from each other and their unique vision which makes them complementary to each other.

And if you wonder about us having sex, yes we do and enjoy it very much on a quite regular basis. This is only to respond to those who imagine that our relationship has to inevitably be a platonic one.

Good luck to you all, may you enjoy life as much as we both do.
A 72 year old man, and a 27 year old woman. ( did you observe how complementary those numbers look?).

Let me start out questioning some of the premises some of you have written. Using the term OLD, as in musty... passé, out of date, dilapidated, wrinkled, etc. All of this has the inevitable ring to it of "ageism". Yes there seems to be a need to rethink all the issues around age. I have found that the term OLD, carries with it the stigma, that when someone wants to be considerate, they right away attach some sort of condescending statement, such as " however, not you...."; or "in your case it is different"; or, "well some people are young at your age..", etc. etc. It smacks too much like all the same sort of cliches that are also present when dealing with race, religion, sexual preferences, nationality, handicapped, etc. Lets get real, the culture is one were all such "differences" are never the source for empathy, respect or even knowledge about the other.

I am 72, and my fiancee is 27. Not even the fact that she will outlive me, is a given. I sure hope she does, but who is there to say that she is providentially protected from any mishap in life. So let us focus on the important issues of why two people come together and spend every possible waking hour together. We work together, we play together, we travel, and party together. We discuss and look out after each other with all the care and dedication that two people who love each other can do. Is she better off with me, than with someone closer to her age? or am I better off with her rather than someone closer to my age? The answer to both our questions is of course yes. Because if that "other" person would be there, we would not be with each other. Are we guaranteed that this will always be the case? of course not, but age has nothing to do with that fact. It has more to do with getting along well, with each other.

Some of the comments here about women fancying an older man because of his wealth, is like the comment of an older man fancying a women because of her shape. There is no shame in a woman valuing the fact that she feels protected economically ( even female lions stay with their lion king in order for him to be their protector), or inversely, why not celebrate the beauty of a young woman who is in good shape? Of course I like the good shape of my partners body, but then if that was the only thing that brought us together, I assure you our relationship would very soon slip away. Probably replaced by someone in even better shape. Remember, there can always be some one richer and someone prettier around the bend.

But as none of this is a competition, but rather the excitement of living together, and sharing life in all of its unfolding diversity and splendor, one should be humble enough to understand that all that one can aspire it to have as a companion someone with whom to celebrate that relationship day in day out. I would venture to say, that one of the advantages of age, is that I have no longer any sort of crisis as to who I am, men my age, already know who they are, for better or worse, we are better in tune with our foibles and limitations than at an earlier stage in life. That enables us both, to allow my partner to take center stage with regard to such issues. She of course still has to find he own voice and meanings in life. Feeling loved and protected, certainly contributes to her sense of self, and finding her own true voice. Being in love is also about making room for each others frailties.

It's quite obvious she hears and sees better than I, and thus at times becomes my guide through those moments when her abilities become important to me. As you can see, our relationship is built around the fact that we both contribute to the relationship, and we contribute all sorts of different talents and abilities, expertise and knowledge, from vantage points that are at a considerable distance from each other and their unique vision which makes them complementary to each other.

And if you wonder about us having sex, yes we do and enjoy it very much on a quite regular basis. This is only to respond to those who imagine that our relationship has to inevitably be a platonic one.

Good luck to you all, may you enjoy life as much as we both do.
A 72 year old man, and a 27 year old woman. ( did you observe how complementary those numbers look?).

Wow, someone has a chip on her shoulder.

Wow "Granddad syndrome poster" i love the stereotype about all us young women looking for wealth!! Thats a bunch of bull$hit! Yes its true in some cases but not all the time. My partner is 31 years older than me and ive been with him for 8 years and i fell in love with him because he was mature, kind and didnt play the stupid games that some of the younger men that ive been with did. Does that mean all young men are immature? absolutely not, but this time i clicked with someone who just happened to be older. He is not rich, nor does he parade me off as some "hot piece of a$$". We have so much more in common then people would think in terms of likes, dislikes and we communicate and keep a good realtionship. Not all us young women are into partying and getting drunk and sleeping with every guy that comes around (is that what us young women are suppose to do?). Nor are all older men in bad shape, who have boring conversations about the "good ol' days, nor do they all look "wrinkly" and old (why are Sean Connery and Robert Redford still popular with women of all ages?!). For example Archie & Edith Bunker (the actors and characters) were in their mid-late 40s when the show started back in 1971!!! DID YOU SEE WHAT THEY LOOKED LIKE? 40 and 50 year olds of today are not the same as was commonly seen in the 60s. How many 40 something year old men and women do you see today that look like the Bunkers? My guess is VERY FEW! You sound like a bitter person, and with that attitude i wouldnt be suprised if you are single. All i can say is that I hit the jackpot with my older gentleman, if you are a young male i wouldnt want anything to do with you, not because you are young, but because you sound like a narrowminded, jealous bigot- who cares if you are a young hot stud, you lack substance, and you apparently know nothing about women. Just because you have a problem with may-december romances dont dismiss them as all superficial relationships.
I dont have status and i dont have immense wealth...so there goes your idiotic and FALSE theory about old men & younger woman. Argue all you want but i am living proof that you are WRONG about your "theory"

Well, just to add something, I think the original poster's assertion is valid in terms of a possible link between AUTISM and older men. I'm a women and expecting a baby, and I will tell you it's not talk shows, but genetic counselors who purport that men over 45 have a risk of mutations in their sperm; this is based on science.

I know of many more children who've been conceived by men over 45 who are healthy and normal, but I do know of at least one little boy who is autistic who was born to a couple with an older father. Of course this is purely anecdotal; however, since you say in your post, "Throughout my lifetime, I've known of many people whose father was older than 40 or 50 when they were born, and none of these people had birth defects or any kind of learning disability" that my personal observation must be valid even if not part of a scientific study. I know no other autistic children personally.

I for one am happy to see two people get together and be happy; I don't care about the age thing. I don't think it's for me, but then, I'm in a great relationship with my husband who's essentially my age, so I'm not looking. But I think that being with someone is different than creating a child with them, and I think it's great that more attention from the scientific community is being given to what risks, if any, there are to reproducing children when parents are older.

As for the knuckle-dragging mouth breathers on Springer, you and I know that's more likely bad behavior by people deemed, for the most part, within the range of "normal" in capacity to learn (perhaps at the low end of the range, but ...). Why people choose to "learn" the acceptability of behavior that lands them on those shows, who can say.

Yea it's an interesting subject that i've seen around the bars and it's more and more popular. Not sure what to think about it other than it's somethign different. I do feel it as a materialistic thing, be it getting some booty or getting some money (men or women). Here's an article: http://blogs.dailycents.com/?p=791

I'm really interested to know who funded this study. (cough) Older white guy? (cough)

I have to be perfectly honest here. I don't want to take offense but this study sounds rather pointless. I could conduct an entire study on how older men produce obese children because they are too old to toss the ball around with them so the kids get fat and die of heart disease. It's really just a compilation of data that I have twisted around to prove a point laced with a few big words and some funding from several demographics who can't stand older men.

I can only speak from my experience, but the younger women I knew that were dating older men were looking for money. I actually hooked up with a girl once who had an older boyfriend. While we were having sex she went on about how unattractive he was and how he looked like an "aging clown." She just wanted some "security." Sadly she was not the only woman I encountered who felt that way.

I'm a huge fan of older women myself, I think they are very very sexy, so I imagine that there has to be women out there who feel the same way about older men. But the majority of them don't. Sorry. Women are not some highly evolved beings who only see love and are blind to anything else. We want hot fresh young boys and we want them now!

Sad thing for the ladies looking to get some cash from an older fellow. He can pretty much put his money in a Trust where he is the sole director. And when he dies she won't get a dime. Maybe if she has a few of his kids she'll get some scraps but probably not much these days.

Sad thing for the older men stalking the younger ladies looking to feel young-ish again, take a look at the list of Millionaires these days. They have an entire list devoted to people under the age of 25 and a rising number of women on that list as well. So older men aren't the only ones forking out the cash these days.

GOOD thing for younger guys...
3 Pros And Cons of Dating A Younger Guy

im 22 and the men i have dated have always been older, recently a 30 yr old. Some of them yes arent over all matured but its almost the same problem with younger men there are good apples and bad ones. I just i suppose have had better luck with older men... but wouldent deny a younger intellegent man a chance.

As one of the older men mating with the younger females I must remind the younger guys that one day, if they are lucky and smart (with decent genes, of course) they could be in the same position.
That does make me wonder though... that could be natures purpose, to weed out the Darwin Award winners. That is, giving the stupid, clumsy, and generally inferior ones a few years to weed themselves out.
I have tried to date women my own age but am put off by their grandmotherly attitude. My next long term partner will be someone closer to my own age but she will have to be pretty special.

I've read various articles about babies born to older men being more likely to have birth defects, and like myself, there are skeptics in the science community who chalk these so-called studies off as another chauvinistic attempt to promote the vanity of the younger father. Throughout my lifetime, I've known of many people whose father was older than 40 or 50 when they were born, and none of these people had birth defects or any kind of learning disability. I've read articles that suggest that schizophrenia is a fabricated mental illness for American psychiatrists to line their own pocket. Let's be real. When you watch TV talk shows like Jerry Springer and see all these mental retards and social degenerates born to young parents, it causes you at least to question the authenticity of such studies claiming that older men run greater risk of producing genetically mutated babies. Celebrities like Tony Randal, David Letterman, and numerous musical entertainers are making babies well into their 50s, 60s, and even 70s, and none of these kids ever seem to have any problems with them. I used to work in social services, and it was my experience that kids born to young parents always seemed to be more likely to fall into drug abuse or other patterns of anti-social behavior. Another point I would like to bring up is that many countries like Japan and Middle Eastern countries encourage men to make babies at older ages, but none of those countries seem to have problems with genetically mutated babies. Could it be something that chemists are putting in the United States of America's Levitra supply? To scientists who promote this belief of older men making birth defect babies, stop promoting rumors.

This article and most people don't acknowledge or know that sperm accumulate mutations with a man's age.

"It is very possible that Paternal Age is the Major Predictor for autism---"Harry Fisch, MD

Harry Fisch is the author of The Male Biological Clock, The Patient's Guide to Vasectomy Reversal, The Patient's Guide to Varicocele Repair and Managing The Vasectomy Patient. He is one of the nation's leaders in the diagnosis and treatment of male infertility and microsurgical vasectomy reversal. Dr. Fisch is director of the Male Reproductive Center and directs urologic microsurgery in the Department of Urology at Columbia University Medical Center of New York Presbyterian Hospital in New York City. He is also professor of clinical urology at Columbia University, where he was recently named Teacher of the Year in his department.For over fifteen years, Dr. Fisch has focused his research, practice, and surgery on male infertility and reproduction.

"In the past several years, studies worldwide have found that with each passing decade of their lives and with each insult they inflict on their bodies, men's fertility decreases, while genetic risk to offspring slowly mounts. The range of findings is staggering: Several studies have shown that the older the man, the more fragmented the DNA in his ejaculated sperm, resulting in greater risk for infertility, miscarriage or birth defects. Investigations out of Israel, Europe, and the United States have shown that non-verbal (performance) intelligence may decline exclusively due to greater paternal age; that up to a third of all cases of schizophrenia are linked to increasing paternal age; and that men 40 and older are nearly six times more likely to have offspring with autism than men under age 30. Other research shows that the risk of breast and prostate cancer in offspring increases with paternal age. "

http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-20070830-000004.xml

http://www.docguide.com/news/content.nsf/news/852571020057CCF68525737D00...

I am 50 and my lovely wife is 29. Our son is one and I run circles around the 20 year olds that I lead overseas (USMC). Yes she keeps me in a younger frame of mind but more importantly she can keep up with me. My ex-wife was looking forward to the life of retirement and I refused to. Sorry.
I plan on living as long as I can and be an example to my children on being useful to family and society.
We have a great relationship, enjoy the same things, and respect each other highly. She is my angel. It works fine if both are mature, especially the man.
Oh yes, I have a one year old grandson too. My children have no problems with the facts.

Evolution is a lie, so this finding is a joke. The best possible companion anyone, man or woman, can have is with a person within 7 years of their own age. All the much older man and much younger women relationships that I known of were usually over with in 5-7 years. And most of the women cheated during the relationship.

You sound bitter...

I'm a woman, 50, absolutely and completely head over heels in love with a man who is turning 75 later this year. I own my own home and have my own stuff. No, I'm not looking for him to look after me. What I love is his intelligence, experience, appreciation for life and his overwhelming respect for me. Dating men my own age fell flat for me. I got tired of having them try to impress me with how much they had, convince me of what a good catch they were and just generally offering poor conversation that centered around, you guessed it, themselves. Really people...it's simply about making a meaningful and loving connection with someone. And the sex? Well, the sex is out of this world. He's just so damned grateful....

Young men have higher death rates than young women due to wars/tribal battles and dangerour occupations like cathching wild animals.

Older men have gathered more wealth than younger men on average so increase the probability of survival of their offspring.

Grand mothers and grand fathers are handy to take care of the grandchildren whilst their children are doing the hard physical work.....Terry W.

I am 73, happily married 51 years. I have always loved my wife completely. She does not love me but that is not the point. I took a vow and I will keep it. I have been madly in love with a woman who is only 24, beautiful, and and ideal woman. I could never tell her that I love her. I feel that she would probably go after me. I love both women but I could never hurt either one, telling my wife or the young woman. It would be wrong to go for the young woman, wrong to dump the wife. I could not do either maybe it is because I love them both too much to hurt either. I believe young men do not really appreciate the love of a woman. Not sexual lust type, but deep love for the woman as a person. Maybe I am just too old to savvy what the world holds out for temptation.

I am 22 and seeing a man that is 43.
Having previously been strongly opposed to a typical older male - younger female relationship, I find it strange to have completely evolved on the subject.

My man is the one having problems with it. Perhaps because he has daughters, or it could be because I am just too good to be true.

Anyways, if people have a connection they have a connection, this man is fit (more so than I), well-spoken, successful, and amazing in the sack.

Not for a minute do I feel like I'm with an 'old man'... perhaps I have an older soul, but I think if there's chemistry there is chemistry.

If women really want the best genes then the best solution is to mate with a healthy older man - at least 80. Women who are most evolved to detect genetic fitness will find these men the most attractive. If they are influenced by western cultural norms of not picking such an older man then they are screwing themselves in evolutionary terms. A guy in his 20s might _look_ fit but may have some genetic flaw that will result in him keeling over next year ...

Ah, no wonder why there are more women than men in the whole world!

If men over 35 produce children are more likely to have more daughters instead of sons in many cases.

Keep up, old men! WOMAN POWER!

Hello im 25,he's 57,we have been friends for over 3 years,and now we have become best freind's.He's just a wonderful person,smart,very mature and sensitive.
I met him on the net Agelesscupid.com three years ago. I am now a happy woman who is deeply in love and planning a wedding ceremony before the end of this year by the grace of God.

"For each old man with a young woman there's a young man without a woman." Huh? What the heck are you talking about? Are you seriously trying to imply that older men hooking up with younger women somehow results in a younger guy being alone? Don't think so sparky. For one thing, there are more women than men in the population.

Also, not all old men act the way you described. My dad will be 70 in January and he doesn't act like a "boring old man, who tells stories of the times when she wasn't born yet and complains of aches and ways of the modern world."

My dad is pretty damn cool for a 70 year old guy. heh,heh. He's funny, not senile at all, runs a few miles on a treadmill everyday, and in his late 50's even got into computers enough that he now calls me and brags about the specs of his newest computer everytime he gets one.

My mom is only 10 years younger than him, but still...if he were not married anymore, I wouldn't be surprised if he could snag a younger women...say maybe 40ish.

He looks 15 years younger than he is.

Way to go, promoting sexist stereotypes in the guise of stupid evolutionary psychology. :P

For each old man with a young woman there's a young man without a woman. So I don´t see how the population growth rate can be greater? And don´t old men have more mutations in their genes which is not good for reproduction?
This is beyond subject, but I have never understood why a young women wants an wrinkled boring old man, who tells stories of the times when she wasn't born yet and complains of aches and ways of the modern world. Maybe money and/or status is more important for some women than decent human relation. All things considered maybe they deserve each other!

"It turns out that older men chasing younger women contributes to human longevity"

Sure... but it must really be irritating to the women! Unless the men are very rich, of course. ;-)

...Bernie
www.sciligion.org

One thing that is not mentioned at all in this story is another theory of what old age is useful for, which is that the elderly act as a repository for cultural information. It is the old who have lived through the most, and learned the most, and their long survival to pass on what they know is beneficial to others in their group. There are not yet good enough models dealing with cultural evolution to quantify this effect, but it may end up being a very significant factor in human aging.